It seems that my current state of unhappiness and discomfort over my length of unemployment have been good for me creatively. Over the last couple of weeks, I have been on a spree. Some pages are still very much in the beginning stages, and many are complete.
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| A crazy undulating mass of doodles. |
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| This is only a background, but it was so pretty I knew I would mess it up somehow. So, I am keeping it just the way it is. |
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| More colorful doodling. |
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| This page is journaling, covered with patterned tissue paper, covered by paint and more journaling, then covered with gesso and Portfolio pastels. I got a lot of frustration out on this one. |
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| The cover of my art journal. It is a nice small, manageable size. So manageable, in fact , that I only have a handful of pages left before I have completed this journal! |
All of this frustration is also finally making me reach my melting point, so I started running on my mini-trampoline to get it out. Art journaling is just not enough. I find it amazing how many employers seem to treat me as un-hirable. Even in positions that I held for multiple years, ones I excelled in, ones that are entry level positions. When I actually do get feedback, I am told I did really well, but someone happened to have more experience or I am not qualified for the position. 13 years of clerical experience apparently means nothing if you have had a couple of bouts of bad luck. Anyway, I had a good cry this afternoon, put on some Tool, and pounded out my frustration and anger and everything on my mini trampoline. It will hopefully help me lose weight and the emotional load I am carrying. If people are using my weight as a reason not to hire me, I am going to do my best to take that away from them.
So, here's to getting through the rough patches with humor, integrity, and art. I got through this once (only a few years ago); I can do it again.
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